Chemobrainfog.....How chemotherapy (hopefully) saved my body and (definitely) rearranged my brain...
Monday, November 12, 2012
POWER FULL ... AND STILL RUNNING ON EMPTY
CAVEAT: Forgive any formatting issues. Editing on an iPad isn't as easy as it COULD be.... or SHOULD be for that matter....
My nephew had the greatest status update on Facebook.
"I think, thanks to this snow storm and Hurricane Sandy, I have been around the same people since I lost power and I am losing my mind."
That about sums things up. I believe we call that "punch drunk." My preference at this point is to remove the punch part, grab a bottle of vodka, insert a straw and just begin drinking. Yes. I'm WELL AWARE that's not healthy but I can assure you that waking up in a home that is 44 degrees is not healthy either. That was the morning we moved out. Reluctantly. But those are dangerously low temperatures and we had no choice. I toughed it out for nine nights before jumping ship.
I'm grateful. I've already expressed my gratitude but in case my gratitude fell between the Sandy cracks, I'll repeat myself. I am lucky and I am thankful. I lost things. Stupid things. A glass table top. Shrubs and trees. I have water damage in my basement because there was no electricity to power the pump. It will take minimal effort to repair and replace the "stuff." Others? From entire homes that have been decimated to half homes that are in need of tremendous work, I know I am lucky. I was inconvenienced. I was annoyed and irritated. Others? Distraught. Rightfully so.
My only frustration throughout this mess has been my inability to connect. Social media is a large part of who I have become. Writing this blog, reaching out on twitter, keeping an eye on Facebook.....those things matter. Some might laugh. Blog? Twitter? Facebook? That's nothing more than "online fun" and for most, social media is simply that: "Online Fun."
I DO have tons of fun while I'm online but it's about the interaction with many people that has impacted me in ways I could never have imagined. I don't even know where to begin to say thank you for the many messages I have received here, in emails, on twitter and on Facebook. The few times I have been able to connect, those messages have made me smile. And.... it's made me realize this "interruption" in my daily life has taken a tremendous toll on me. There are a few people about whom I am concerned. I have not been able to keep my eye on them. That's been troubling. I brainstorm with many and losing the ability to do that is troubling. Missing two BCSM chats and quite possibly a third (tonight) is troubling.
On the other hand, I think I was burning the candle at both ends. The storm and its aftermath left me with little to do but step back. I wasn't slowing down on my own. Sandy knocked me down and kept me down. I was prepared for power outages. I had all sorts of portable chargers to keep my phone and my iPad running. I had a car with a full tank of gas to recharge everything. So much for thinking I had even the slightest element of control. Quite frankly, Mother Nature kicked my ass.
I needed a little cooperation from either Verizon or AT&T. Today is day 15 and I still do not have their blessing. I can get online for short periods of time but LTE? Not sustainable for more than moments at a time. 3G? Worse than dial up. The cell towers tumbled right alongside the trees. Whatever tiny signal on either of their "internal" networks was available was overloaded by demand. It was fully ten days before I saw pictures of flooded tunnels and charred homes. My radio, my sole source of information, did no justice to what 50 BILLION dollars of damage actually looks like.
Let it be known that I love my iPad but it has its limitations. Trying to upload photos via the blogger interface is challenging. File sharing without WiFi is virtually impossible. I have many photos (some just taken yesterday) of the streets in and around my home. There are still wires dangling or draped across roadways. The magnitude of the damage around me is unprecedented. I have personally seen trucks and workers from Wisconsin, Tennessee, Colorado, Illinois, Michigan, Pennsylvania, Texas, Alabama and Louisiana working independently to clear trees from wires. I can't drive more than a few blocks without seeing a caravan headed to a worksite or a flagman directing cars around the men in the cherry pickers.
LIPA, the local power company can't be faulted for their shitty infrastructure. The money required to overhaul their grid would send my already exorbitant utility bills into the stratosphere. Having a hurricane collide with another storm thus creating a superstorm isn't something for which they can be blamed. Having temperatures immediately plummet to record lows, again, not their fault. A nor'easter dumping eight inches of WET snow on compromised and weakened trees just days later, also, not. their. fault.
However, none of this exonerates them from their failure to get in front of this thing. Hold a daily press conference to provide an update. Instead, they are in hiding. Creating anarchy. And here I go, off on another rant. I just went to their "outage" site to see how many people are still waiting for electricity. They are doing my favorite thing. Skewing numbers. Except, someone needs to tell them how to do this without letting everyone actually SEE their blatant lies.
The present map breaks down the three areas that LIPA serves. One of them is known as the Rockaway Peninsula. It's destroyed. The ocean pushed up so far into the community, there are now cars parked on a heap of sand. They can not safely restore power to that area. I may have chemobrain and my brain may SUCK at numbers but ..... well, you tell me if this adds up.
Please note : While LIPA is able to deliver power to the electric grid, there are currently up to 17,500 customers in Nassau and Suffolk , and 37,500 customers in the Rockaway Peninsula who are currently unable to safely receive power without customer repairs.These 55,000 customers should be subtracted from the total number of outages to accurately reflect how many customers who can receive power safely are without service.
NASSAU 46,703
ROCKAWAY PENINSULA12,346**
SUFFOLK 9,505
** DEDUCT 37,500 FROM HERE? How does that work? I think I missed the lesson on how to calculate using "funny math. " I sure hope someone in the media picks up on this and points it out. Talk in numbers, damn it. Real numbers.
Clearly, the bitch is back.......
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I'm glad to see you are back on line even if only partially.
ReplyDeleteThanks Carolyn...
DeleteI'm scheming right now. I MAY have found a spot in my home where I can have a sustained LTE signal. I may have to change my preferred venue for "command central" to another room! Missed you!!
Hugs,
AM
Call me slow but the thought finally occurred to me that while utilities have gotten fairly good at providing outage maps with estimated time of restored power, shouldn't cell phone services have to provide outage maps with estimates of restored service? Hmmmm...
DeleteIt's amazing how we become used to our connections, eh? The world is far more quiet without them . . . I'm glad to hear you've moved - I assume to somewhere with heating? Thank goodness for warm beds, we are so lucky that in the best of times we have these comforts - your post is certainly a reminder of that. Take care & be safe, Catherine
ReplyDeleteCatherine,
DeleteI'm back home! I moved out for three nights and finally, the electric was restored. Heat, hot water and lights were wonderful. Seeing the news was also wonderful. Having a crappy cell connection for the ipad was frustrating and that continues to frustrate me but keeping it in perspective. Today I have to get the gardener on the phone to see if he can salvage two partially uprootted trees. It's the mundane stuff that is bringing me lots of joy these days! I think I saw you were at a huge celebration in Canada...... I hope there are photos coming or a blogpost. Have lots of reading to do so you may have already written about this.
xoxxox
AMM
I'm so glad you are back home now...This has been horrible and continues to be so...Hugs and prayers for you and for all those in NY, NJ and Connecticut who are suffering.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Kathleen. It was a joy to sleep in my own bed WITH the television to lull me to sleep. It's the little things..... And the BIG things, too!
DeleteGlad to have you back in the blogging world AnneMarie! I have missed your posts. I appreciate that "the bitch is back" because your writing, insights, sense of humor, and ability to connect with so many people in so many ways is needed. I continue to think about those still without power, and about the tragic explosion in Indianapolis. Crazy stuff brings us back to what really matters.
ReplyDeleteLisa...
DeleteI did not even KNOW about Indy until you wrote it here.... goes to show you how wrapped up we are in the tri-state area in the clean up. That's horrible. I'm semi-back.... Hoping the DSL provider comes through!
I am so glad you left and are back home now with electric power and starting to be able to tackle to mess that this horrible storm left. I think about you every day and keep hoping things are getting better for you. Hugs and prayers to you and we will be thinking of you tonight when we have #bcsm Tweetchat.Love-Susan
ReplyDeleteI MAY be in the chat tonight..... I've found a way to make my ipad into a hotspot. There is ONE location in my home where I am getting an LTE connection. My laptop is connected to the internet through the iPad. It just went down on me so this isn't optimal but we shall see!
DeleteI'm choosing to be hopeful about tonight!!
Happy to "hear" your voice again AM! And to know that you and your fam are OK and have power. Thank heavens for big and small miracles! Stay safe. xoxo
ReplyDeleteThanks, Renn....
DeleteHard to believe but the area is still a mess.... three weeks after the fact..... AND, I didn't have any water damage. I have some very dear friends who are dealing with terrible water damage.
xoxox
What an ordeal! I'm sure you were going stir-crazy after a few days. I'm so so so glad you're safe and even more glad to see your blog up and running again. xo
ReplyDeleteHa! Stir crazy, cabin fever... no matter how you slice it, I think my nephew summed it up best when he said he was losing his mind from being around the same people!!! I laughed so hard when I saw that..... The people who had power got stuck with a few too many house guests because of those freezing temps.
Deletexoxo